Mic check……….1……….2……….

I have not written in a while, not because I don’t have or know what to write but because I have not been motivated. July to September are the most challenging part of the year because, on the 4th of July weekend, I saw my sister face to face in North Carolina; August was when her health started to really go wrong, and September was when she finally transitioned. So I have been in a dark place doing the same old thing every day and trying not to think about it, and writing has not been on my mind.

You know how a musician tests his microphone to ensure the sound is good when preparing for a concert? Many of us need to do a mic check on our mental health to ensure we are in the place to put up a good show. We have to ensure our audience (work, kids, spouse, partners, friends, friends with benefits, and all others) enjoys the show we put on.

I have used the last few months to do my mic check by traveling, reconnecting with old friends, spending time with those who mattered, and focusing on work and school. We have to go through life and not let life go through us; pain is not going to go away, but once we’ll sleep and not wake up. Every night, I go to bed, and when I wake up, I am grateful because I acknowledge the fact that some people did not get the opportunity before I go to bed at the end of my day; I am also thankful that some people started the day and did not finish it. Either way, I am appreciative; I have accepted that I have to continue living with this void and pain, but I am going to make sure it does not overrule everything else that makes me happy. In conversations with my uncle, he told me that in pursuit of so-called happiness, we lose sight of what we have chasing what we do not; in other words, we are pursuing what could be instead of focusing on what is in front of us.

It is challenging to do a Mic check while grieving, but I have realized one has to make a conscious effort because grieving is a lifelong process and will never go away; those of us grieving the loss of a loved one or those of your grieving a particular life event needs to make sure we do our best to live life, do a Mic check here and there to make sure the show we put is the best version of ourselves. At the end of the day, we have to stay GRIEVING AND LIVING to the fullest.

How do you do your Mic check? Please share some ideas you practice. Someone out there might need it.